Grissom
is
just so utterly cute when he blushes.
I
didn’t
mean to make him do it when I pointed out the tag on his coat, but he
did
anyway, and I have to say I enjoyed seeing the color run up under his
skin.
He pulled the tag off and
stuffed it in his pocket,
then gave me that sweet lopsided grin.
“Thanks.”
I
grinned
back.
“No
problem.”
Stepping through the door, I
closed it behind
me.
Grissom moved back out of the
way,
and as I turned the key in the lock I heard his voice, almost too low
to catch.
“You look very
elegant, Sara.”
Well,
that’s
one advantage of having a bod that’s bone structure and not
much else.
Hearing him say it, though,
made my stomach
all warm and gooey.
“Thanks,”
I parroted
to the door, and managed to get the key out of the lock without
fumbling
it.
Everything
was awkward again as we headed for his car, and Grissom actually opened
the
door for me, which didn’t help with the gooey part.
We
started chatting about the lecture and the
Bog People and it got easier; they were one of my interests back in
college for
a while, so I had a little background info.
The auditorium was filling up
by the time we got there, but Grissom
snagged us seats near the front, and before we sat down I turned to
look up at
the other rows.
“Looks like a big
draw
for an anthro talk.”
Grissom
pursed his lips in one of his little smirks.
“Ancient death is
as classic a topic as the identity of Shakespeare or
the fate of the Romanovs,” he said, and I laughed, wondering
if we qualified as
sensation hunters tonight.
Doctor
Kammelman was making his way through the rows, so we took our seats as
the
lights dimmed.
He
was
tall
and kind of spare, graying and messy in that absent-minded-professor
way, and
all the pieces of paper hanging out of his pockets made me think of
Grissom
stuffing his memos into his jacket so he won’t have to deal
with them.
When he got to the podium,
Kammelman focused
on the slip he was holding.
“Good
evening, my name is Doctor Ari Kammelman.”
I
leaned
back in my chair, ready to learn, but instead of diving right into the
lecture
Doctor Kammelman looked out at the audience.
“I wrote that this
morning because my assistant Genevieve is constantly
reminding me that I need to introduce myself at the beginning of each
lecture.
So that’s for YOUR
benefit, since I’m
perfectly aware of who I am.”
Some
of
the
audience started to snicker as he continued.
“Frankly, I see my
reflection in the mirror every morning, so I’ve never
had trouble identifying myself.” With
a
grin directed at the audience at large, he started the talk with some
PowerPoint slides.
And he was good. He
kept moving, which was slightly
distracting, but not as much as the professor I had in grad school who
would
wander up and down the aisles while lecturing. I
suppressed the urge to take notes, and
listened.
It
was
fascinating.
There’ve been over
a
thousand bodies found in bogs, some of which were obviously
deliberately
killed, but there’s not a lot of evidence as to
why--sacrifice, murder, or
execution. Doctor
Kammelman eschewed the
wilder theories for the most part and explained what was
known about the bodies.
Grissom
wasn’t paying the same attention, though, which kind of
surprised me.
For a minute I thought he was
bored, but when
I glanced over he looked kind of upset, tense and distracted. When
it didn’t let up I reached out and put a
hand on his arm.
“Grissom?”
He
blinked,
relaxing a little.
“Sara…” His
smile was small, but it was there.
“You
went
sort of pale for a moment.
Migraine?” If
it was, no way was I going to let him
stay.
But as I was trying to figure
out
how I could get his keys away from him and drive him home, Grissom
shook his
head.
I gave him a doubtful look,
trying
to figure out how to ask him if he wanted to leave, but before I could
frame a
sentence he slid his hand over and pushed his fingers through mine.
Wow. I
wasn’t expecting that,
but I was hardly going to pull away. I
tightened my fingers a bit and savored his
grip; the last couple of times he’d taken my hand I had been
too distracted to
really pay attention, but there was no major crisis in my life at the
moment,
thank God.
Grissom has warm hands, with
tough skin from all the work he does, and his palm was dry and smooth. I
let my thumb explore the texture of his
skin and tried to concentrate on the lecture, but it wasn’t
exactly easy to get
back into the facts about the Yde Girl, even if someone had done a
facial
reconstruction on her.
Besides,
Grissom wasn’t exactly holding still either.
His fingers kept flexing
gently, sliding between mine as though trying
to learn the shape of them, and frankly it made me want to get rid of
the
armrest between us and snuggle up against him.
His touch was soothing and
arousing simultaneously--a constant reminder
that not only was he spending time with me outside of work and of his
own free
will, the goal of this whole thing was seduction.
Of
me.
Damn,
was
it
working.
We
had
to
let go of each other to applaud, and I was surprised at how reluctant I
was to
release his hand, but Doctor Kammelman deserved the acclaim. Grissom
glanced over at me, and I could tell
that he didn’t want to let go either.
That warmed up my stomach as
much as his compliment.
Most
of
the
audience started to leave, but a few were lining up at the front to
talk to Kammelman.
“Did you want to
ask him any questions?”
Grissom asked.
I
looked
over at him.
He nodded at the stage
encouragingly, but I knew that if I started talking to Kammelman
we’d be there
all night.
“Nnnnnnot
really,” I temporized, glancing back at the cart full of what
the doctor had
dryly termed “visual aids”. “I
wouldn’t
mind looking at that skull, but I doubt we’re allowed to
handle anything.’
“Probably
not,” Grissom admitted. It
was funny--we
two were most likely the only other people in the auditorium with
extensive
experience handling bones, but I didn’t think that would
count.
I
wasn’t
sure what Grissom had in mind to do after the lecture, but taking my
hand again
as we left the building wasn’t one of the possibilities
I’d thought of.
It was
more…public, really, than holding
hands in the middle of an oblivious audience.
We looked down at the point
of contact almost as though our hands had
joined on their own, then up at each other, and I couldn’t
help smiling a
little.
“You’re
holding my hand,
Grissom,” I pointed out. I
wasn’t going
to let him pretend it was just a fluke.
But
it
didn’t look as though pretending was on his mind.
“And
you’re holding mine,” he answered. “Amazing
how such an action can be passive
and active at the same time.”
Passive,
huh?
That was a whole can of worms
I
didn’t want to open right then.
“Yeeeeeah,”
I managed, and let the subject drop.
But
his
hand
sure felt good around mine.
Still.
Dusk
was
cooling the air, and we didn’t hurry on our way back to his
car.
It was…nice…just
to walk with Grissom, without work or anger or frustration getting in
the
way.
He
actually
helped me into the car this time, which was not
something I was used to.
It made me feel
feminine, and kind of pleased and vulnerable at the same time. Maybe
it was those feelings that made me
speak when he got into his seat.
“So--“
I
said, making it a question.
Grissom
smiled a little.
“So
the
night has barely begun.
I was thinking
that while it’s too early for dinner in our case, maybe a
good cup of
tea?”
How
did
he
come up with something so perfect?
We
drove
for
a little while, talking about the lecture.
Like when we were walking,
things were easier; work wasn’t
interfering.
I knew I was rambling a
bit, but Grissom didn’t seem to mind, and it felt good to
just talk with
him--to get his opinion on something besides the odds of catching
Vegas’ latest
murderer or rapist.
Finally
it
dawned on me that we’d been driving for a while, and I asked
him where we were
going.
He directed my attention to
the
sign down the street.
“The Mile Chai
Club.
Is that all right?”
I
could
feel
the blush crawling up my face.
His words
took me right back to that airplane bathroom and the way he’d
maneuvered me
into telling him about Ken and that less-than-memorable flight. But
at the same time, I was flattered. When
he’d mentioned tea, I’d thought he was
taking me to Starbucks, or one of those flashy casino cafés,
not an independent
tea house.
And
I
was
impressed by his taste, too.
Mile High
has the best blends in town.
I
laughed
a
little and managed to glance over at him.
“You’re…taking
this whole seduction thing seriously, aren’t you?”
His
fingers
tightened on the wheel, and all of a sudden I remembered that he was
probably
just as nervous as I was.
It gave me a
weird sort of tender confidence, and I put my hand on his leg, trying
to
reassure him.
Whoops. That
was a good deal more intimate than
holding hands.
Grissom made a faint
noise, then swallowed.
“Yes, I
am,” he
muttered.
“Utterly.”
He
looked
over at me, and the depth and the appeal in his eyes went right through
me.
“Is it
working?” he asked
softly.
Oh
man.
I
almost blurted out just how well it was
working, but in the end I only smiled, and he gave me the same look he
had over
the lab table, and I just about melted on the spot.
We
held
hands on our way into Mile Chai, too; it just seemed right. I
wasn’t sure that the place was really Grissom’s
style--most of its customers were my age or younger--but he
didn’t look
uncomfortable.
It’s a good space,
with a
high ceiling and lots of little tables, and groovy art on the walls;
and unlike
Starbucks, it isn’t full of accessories you can buy.
If
you want a Mile Chai-themed mug to take
home, you have to ask at the counter.
“I’ll
have a
summer peach tea with two spoonfuls of molasses sugar
please,” I ordered.
Instead of using their own
names, the staff
all picks literary aliases; I was glad that it wasn’t
Orsino’s shift, because
he always flirts with me, and I didn’t want anything
interrupting the
mood.
I let myself lean against
Grissom,
just because I could, but he was looking up at the menu board with the
air of a
man confronted with way too many choices.
“
He
drew
in a
breath.
“One cup of
Jeedarling
please.”
I
almost snorted. It
was a very close thing.
The brewmistress just started
giggling, but I
managed to control myself as Grissom glared at me.
“You
got flustered--interesting,” I
said.
“I
got
distracted,” he grumbled, paying for the tea.
“It
was
cute,” I told him.
“And
that’s not a
word I get to apply to you very often, Grissom.
I like it when
you’re distractible.
And cute.”
His
mouth
was twitching the way it did when he didn’t want to smile,
and that just made
me laugh, so I led him over to a window table.
He held my chair for me,
which I wasn’t expecting.
“You
are SO
into the date manners,” I commented, taking his hand again as
he sat down.
He relaxed--I could see his
shoulders
loosening--and let out the smile.
“Why
peach
tea?”
I
shrugged.
“I used to drink it
back in
San Francisco; in the winter it gave me a little taste of summer, and
in the
summer it was great when it was ice cold.”
And it was a change from
boring old Lipton.
“This was before
the big boom in coffee bars;
back in the dark ages, so drinking tea was practically required for a
bohemian
like me.”
I smirked at him.
“Bohemian,”
he said, looking at me like he was picturing it, and I felt a little
exposed.
I glanced down.
Grissom
took
a breath.
“I never had the
courage to be
bohemian.
When I liked something
off-beat, like Monarchs or haggis or Edgar Rice Burroughs, I had to
keep it to myself.”
He
liked
haggis?
I couldn’t quite
bring myself to
ask.
“Burroughs? As
in the creator of Tarzan?” I
had trouble picturing him watching old
Tarzan films, but he nodded.
Our
tea
arrived, and I took out the tea ball before mine got too strong,
stirring it to
get the residue of sugar off the bottom.
Grissom added plain refined
sugar to his own from the selection on the
table, and I wondered if he would like the Darjeeling; it’s a
nice subtle variety,
not too weird for the tea novice.
He
seemed
a
little distracted, staring out the window, but then he put his hand on
mine,
and started rubbing his thumb over my wrist.
I felt goosebumps come up all
over my skin, and shivered.
“Okay, THAT was a
seductive move,” I said, my
voice a little uneven.
“You
have
delicate wrists,” Grissom said, his mouth curling into a
small smile.
I shrugged.
“I’m
a
woman, slighter of build than you are; not as strong but potentially
faster.”
And don’t think I
hadn’t
thought about the inherent contrasts.
“Capable
of
longer endurance and able to withstand more pain, according to the
anthropologist Desmond Morris,” Grissom noted.
His thumb was resting on my
pulse point.
“But I
don’t think he considered how appealing some of the innate
delicacy of a woman is. I
look at your
wrists and wonder if kissing them would affect you.”
Whoa.
I meeped and grabbed my cup,
completely floored by the images his words
conjured up.
The mere idea of his lips
on my skin was enough to make my heart speed up. Grissom’s
thumb moved again, a slow tingling
stroke.
“Too
much?”
“No.” I
shook my head, above all not wanting him to
stop.
“Good. Very…sexy.”
He
blushed a
little at that, and I had to wonder what had made someone normally
unflappable
so shy.
And speaking of
which…I put down
my cup.
There were some things that I
just couldn’t ignore any longer. “Not
that I’m not enjoying all this, and I don’t want to
break the spell here, but I
HAVE to ask--why now, Grissom?”
He
cleared
his throat, and I half-expected him to put me off, but instead Grissom
looked
me straight in the eye.
“Sara…back
when
I first asked you to come to Las Vegas, I wasn’t ready for
you; for everything
you were, and are--intense, dedicated, vibrant, impulsive.
All
of those qualities fascinated me then and
now.”
I
bit my
tongue, not wanting to interrupt him.
Grissom went on. “But
the man I
was six years ago was…immature, emotionally.
I had no idea of how to begin
any sort of relationship that wasn’t
centered in my work or connected to it somehow.
And when I realized how you
felt about me, I panicked.”
Oh. There
was a lump in my throat.
All this time, all the
frustration--I wanted
to yell at him, and at the same time I wanted to comfort him. His
hand squeezed mine, his words speeding up. “A
lot happened in that time--I became your
boss instead of your coworker; I nearly lost my hearing; I was stalked
and lost
my perspective on cases and had a lot of maturing to do.
But
when I saw you begin to fall apart it
shook me out of my self-centeredness. I
understood that I was a part of that; a cause of your unhappiness. And
I realized too--“
He
looked
at
me, as though asking for permission to continue, and I nodded. He
sucked in a breath.
“--That you have
always been my
constant.
You are the one element in my
life that comforts me.”
Oh,
that
did
it, I was a goner.
I’d doubted for so
long, wondered whether he really did care, whether I had any effect on
him at
all--he was breaking and mending my heart at the same time. It
hurt, but there was no way I was going to
give up one second of the pain.
Grissom
kept
going.
“I’ll
never figure you out, never
understand why you stand by me the way you do, Sara.
And
I can’t make up for all the lost time and
the misunderstandings and general grief we’ve gone through
since I reached my
realization, but if you’re still willing to give me a chance,
I’m more than
ready to…”
He
trailed
off, and I finished his sentence, trying not to sob or laugh. “Seduce
me?”
Grissom
let
go of my hand and touched my face, and the coolness that followed the
brush of
his fingers made me realize that a tear had gotten loose.
I
grabbed my napkin and wiped at it, giggling
a little despite myself.
“Sorry, umm, I
just wasn’t expecting…honesty.”
He
took
the
napkin gently out of my hand and blotted up the moisture, and there was
so much
tenderness in his touch that I just wanted to lean into his hand and
never let
him stop.
There
didn’t
seem to be a lot to say after that. We
touched instead, light casual connections, as though now that we had
the
freedom to do so we were making up for lost time. I
didn’t want to go when we finally finished
our drinks, didn’t want that spell to break.
We dawdled back to the car
eventually, and I got in and belted up,
untangling my scarf from the seat belt with a smirk.
“We’re
both really bad at this, aren’t
we?”
Grissom
huffed a laugh.
“I’ve
NEVER been good at
this,” he said.
“I suppose I should
take
you home now.”
I
did not want
this night to end just yet…and
he’d promised to seduce me. “You
could
come in,” I offered, staring out the windshield.
He
didn’t
say no.
We
were
quiet on the drive back, too.
I couldn’t
help wondering what his next move would be, the next step in seduction,
and
felt my whole body come alive at just the imagining of a kiss. If
he could do so much to me just by touching
my wrist…
When
Grissom
shut off the engine and spoke my name, I turned to look at him. He
seemed tense, nervous almost, and it
occurred to me that he might still be worried that I was going to back
out of
this.
I cupped my hand over his
cheek,
letting my fingers trace the warm contour, feeling the light prickle of
his
beard in my palm.
“You
have no
idea how it makes me feel to know you want this too,
Grissom,” I told him.
“I know tonight is
supposed to be all about
me, but I’m SO glad you…we--talked.”
His
confession had made the whole thing real,
told me he was truly invested in this.
In
me.
His
face
lightened under my touch, and I stopped worrying.
Our
bodies
flirted as we went inside, brushing and bumping in a sensual little
dance.
I led Grissom into my
apartment, realizing
that I’d forgotten to leave a light on, and heard him close
the door behind me.
Grissom, in my personal
space, with no crisis
hanging over us…I laughed with the incredulous delight of it. “The
closest light is the lamp on the end
table.
Think you can find
it?”
It
didn’t
surprise me that he turned it on without tripping or fumbling. After
all, he’d been here before.
The
light
behind
him put his face in shadow, edging his hair with silver and making him
loom
just a little.
I felt vulnerable again,
and it wasn’t an entirely unpleasant sensation.
He shifted his weight, and it
struck me that my Grissom--could I say
that?--my courteous, chivalrous Grissom, was letting me have control.
I
let my
breath out, feeling warm anticipation spreading through my veins. “This
is where I sit with you on my sofa, and
we neck.”
And he smiled.